Never There.
By Catherine Kelley.
“Mom hides the vodka in the washing machine. Her frown, all through breakfast and dinner, is like the sodden rag on the kitchen floor that smells of Dad’s sourdough starter and the vinegar he sprinkles over our pasta salads because Mom doesn’t cook anymore. ”
A Drink at Sundown by Wendy Sherwell.
Mom hides the vodka in the washing machine. Her frown, all through breakfast and dinner, is like the sodden rag on the kitchen floor that smells of Dad’s sourdough starter and the vinegar he sprinkles over our pasta salads because Mom doesn’t cook anymore. When she drinks straight from a wine bottle at the dinner table, Dad says, “She’s calming her nerves” in his comic voice.
Mom kneels next to my bed in the heavy air, and in her heavy voice she prays, “Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can . . .” After I wipe her eyes with my tissue, I send a prayer out my bedroom window: Dear Jesus, can you make her stop?
She swerves back and forth across the double yellow line, barely missing the divider. We’re on our way to Aunt Betty’s again, my babysitter when Mom thinks it’s just too much. “I bet she’ll let you have an Otter Pop or a Snickers,” Mom says. But I want a mother.
Then another day, I spill my orange juice on the white tablecloth or smudge my school clothes with grass stains and blood. “That’s what the washing machine is for,” Mom says, her voice sweet as her rose perfume, and when her arms encircle me, it’s like the vodka had never even been there.
The Blood Pudding – November 27, 2023
Catherine Kelley writes from Southern California and has had stories published in Everyday Fiction, The Frogmore Papers, 805, East of the Web, and The Bookends Review. She practices Zen meditation, hoping it will someday help her forgive the people who dump garbage on her street.
Artwork: Wendy Sherwell is an eclectic painter with varying styles. She has been painting for approx. 20 years with some tuition but is mainly self-taught. She uses professional grade oil only and is quite prolific. You can find her work here.